Reflections

I don't usually write this kind of stuff.But I'll just be open and honest.

I've wondered so many times if God actually exists.
Don't get me wrong,I believe in God!But I've never actually thought about this and now I have and everything is...different.Suddenly I felt so insecure.
Yeah,sure there's been signs and wonders and Pastor has given us so many words from God but I just needed something more to convince me.
And guess what?I got it!

One day I was feeling slight depression...
It's one of those days when not even books can help you.
And I didn't feel like going to my sis or my mum because the situation was private.
So I took out my journal and talked to God.
I was thinking as I wrote that the reason why it is so easy to talk to God because you know that He's not listening to you just to load it out to others in the form of gossip,or look at you disdainfully thinking that He made a mistake in creating you and that you're a weirdo.

In short,He just understands.
That's how perfect God actually is!

And everytime I load of my problems to God,I feel this unavoidable feeling of love.
Enveloping over me like a hug.Then suddenly I have the strength to move on and that life is worth living.And when I relate this to my mum I just cry.

I didn't have enough faith to believe that God existed and actually had the stupidity to think that I was wasting my time on Him and He still loves me?

Now God is like my best friend.
He's just been so good to me.
He never even gave up on me even though I must have hurt Him alot.

Thank You God.
I love You.